 In the words of comedian Lewis Black, "You have to be brain-dead not to think a fart is funny." (Me of Little Faith, 2008) We're counting down our top 5 funniest fart and toilet scenes from movies. These scenes are certain to make you crack a smile on even your worst of days. #5. Dumb and Dumber (1994)Before Lloyd (Jeff Daniels) heads over to Mary Swanson's house for a date, Lloyd's best friend Harry (Jim Carrey) spikes Lloyd's coffee with a whole bottle of laxative out of sheer jealously. Moments after Lloyd arrives at Mary Swanson's house for the date, he is met with an overwhelming urge to evacuate his colon. Funniest Part: Lloyd's bathroom responses to Mary Swanson. Most would find the sounds of Lloyd's colon, or even the emptying of the broken toilet out of the window, the funniest bits. However, there is a sheer classic Dumb and Dumber moment simply in what Lloyd says to stall Mary as she questions his long bathroom break from the hallway. From the hallway, Mary says, "I hope you're not using the toilet -- it's broken." To which Lloyd responds, "No, I was just shaving." Mary then questions, "Shaving?" To which Lloyd says, "Yeah, I was running a little late. I thought this would save some time". Why This Is Funny: Lloyd's responses are funny for 2 reasons. The first is that he arrived at Mary's with a clean shaven face, to which we have to assume Mary noticed when Lloyd arrived at her house. The second is Lloyd's attempt to genuinely convince Mary that by shaving at her place, that would save some time -- a classic Dumb and Dumb moment. A response by Lloyd intended to be taken seriously by Mary, according to Lloyd, but to anyone with a brain, shaving will take the same amount of time whether he shaved at his house or Mary's. #4. Love Stinks (1999)Just moments after shutting the lights off for the evening, indignant husband Seth (French Stewart) begins his colon tirade in an effort to annoy his wife Chelsea (Bridgette Wilson) before the two fall asleep. Funniest Part: The unique and acrobatic farts Seth's first two basic farts are designed to disturb the peace, with the third fart exemplifying his impressive release coordination. Just before he releases the third fart, Seth says to Chelsea, "...I feel like I've passed the worst of it and I need some cuddle time. Oh wait, I was wrong -- incoming." The third fart comes to us in a high pitch squeal at first and then abruptly graduates to an air puncher, exemplifying Seth's phenomenal sphincter control. However, Seth's sphincter skills really shines with his fourth fart. Just before he releases it, he says, "Feet are on fire. Wait wait wait wait wait." What follows is a single, gaseous fart that is selectively broken up and impressively muted at intervals as it leaves Seth's colon. Why This Is Funny: While most movie fart scenes attempt to extract humor from the loudness and texture of the fart, the farts from "Love Stinks" show us an amazingly acrobatic and skillful release of methane. Superb control and coordination. #3. White Chicks (2004)Almost immediately after lactose intolerant surrogate for Tiffany Wilson, FBI agent Kevin Copeland (Marlon Wayans), consumes nearly an entire tray of cheese hors d'oeurves, the gas leaks begin and she (he) breaks for the toilet. Funniest Part: "Move, bitch." Since Kevin is posing as Tiffany Wilson, he must use the women's bathroom to keep his cover. As he storms the women's bathroom door, he literally runs into a lady leaving the bathroom and says, "Move, bitch." Why This Is Funny: Kevin says, "Move, bitch" as Kevin, in a deep, masculine voice instead of his feminine, bubbly imitation Tiffany Wilson voice. Kevin's complete lack of regard to keeping his true identity a secret as he runs into the lady leaving the bathroom tells us how badly his rear needs to make contact with the lips of a toilet. Once Kevin touches on the toilet, he's quickly reminded that his girlfriends followed him into the bathroom from their mirror conversation. Remembering that he is posing as Tiffany Wilson, he attempts to control the gas flow rate. Unfortunately, Kevin has been plagued with high pressure methane. This means that no matter how slow he attempts to release the gas, large volumes of trumpets break through, leaving little to no room for control of flow rate. Kevin eventually yields to the pressure in his colon and unleashes the gaseous wrath. This disturbs the peace of his girlfriends' mirror conversation. Almost as if they were fearful for their safety, the girlfriends anxiously leave the bathroom and Kevin to his own devices. #2. Haunted House (2013)A live video feed at 2:43 a.m. of young couple Kisha (Essence Atkins) and Malcolm (Marlon Wayans) sleeping in their bed captures the dark, inexplicable flatulence of a sleeping and almost completely motionless Kisha. Funniest Part: The force of Kisha's farts inflate the bed sheets while she remains completely motionless. The first fart introduces itself after a loud rumble, which, after the fart, we assume the rumble came from Kisha's colon. Right off the bat, the first fart pitches a tent due to its force and wakes Malcolm up. At times, the first fart appears to wane, but comes back and remains forcefully strong until the end. Malcolm makes it known the first fart is rancid because he coughs and says, "How could someone so cute be so stink?" He brushes it off and heads back to sleep. Why This Is Funny: The powerful force of Kisha's farts, reflected in the movement of the bed sheets, is met with absolutely zero movement or response from Kisha until it wakes her up. 3 minutes later, the second fart comes roaring in with such a force and smell that it forces Malcolm to get out of bed to fetch an air freshener. As Malcolm makes an effort to freshen up the air while Kisha remains asleep, the next series of farts begin and are released in an almost conversation-like manner with Malcolm. Eventually, the smell of the subsequent farts is no match for the air freshener. Malcolm is forced to leave the room, only to be yelled at one last time by a fart who attempts to claim victory without Malcolm hearing, but he does. #1. Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)While Deuce (Rob Schneider) and his father, Bob (Richard Riehle), are having a serious conversation in the bathroom about man whoring, a gentleman walks in and creates quite the colon backing track. Funniest Part: To this day, no one knows the conversation Deuce and his dad had in the bathroom. Try as you may, you'll never be able to comprehend the conversion between Deuce and his father, as the gentleman in the stall creates an attention diversion. Why This Is Funny: The serious inquiry about man whoring by Deuce to his father brushes up against and holds hands with the slapstick intestine orchestra during their entire conversation. Every effort is made to hear what sage advice Bob has for Deuce regarding man whoring, but the gentleman in the stall next to them -- who is blowing out his intestines -- would rather you not know. What makes this scene even more hilarious is that both Deuce and Bob completely ignore the trumpet screams from the gaseous gentleman in the stall until he dumps what sounds like clam chowder into the toilet. In the midst of collecting his thoughts to respond to his dad, Deuce finally caves and turns to look at the stall in what appears to be complete perplexity and disgust. That brings an end to our top 5 funniest movie fart scenes! Let us know below what you think of our list and if there are other hilarious movie fart scenes worthy of acknowledgment.
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 Handicapped parking spots, or "accessible parking spaces", as they're now referred to, are parking spots for people with disabilities, made possible by the 1990 Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). The self-evident purpose of a handicapped parking spot is to make it easier and more convenient for a disabled person to access the entrance of a venue or facility. A noble gesture! But what is it exactly about a handicapped parking spot that makes it convenient? Is it the spacing of the spot? Sometimes. Handicapped parking spots can be relatively larger than non-handicapped parking spots to accommodate those with wheel chairs. However, some parking lots don't have these larger handicapped spots -- usually really small parking lots -- so some disabled people miss out on this convenience. Of course! It's the distance between the handicapped parking spot and the entrance of the facility that makes handicapped parking spots convenient, right? No, sorry! Not only is the distance between a handicapped parking spot and the entrance of a facility inconsistent depending on the location, but some locations, such as a sports arena, have additional parking lots a few blocks away that also contain handicapped parking spaces. Additionally, those parking lots that do have the larger handicapped parking spaces, these larger spaces are only located directly in front of the bank that happens to be quite the distance from the restaurant in the same parking lot. No one is depositing any checks this evening -- just steak. So if it's not always about the spacing, and never about the distance, what then is it about a handicapped parking space that is supposed to make it convenient? Their God-given purpose is convenience, right? Nope! Based on the logic above, the purpose of a handicapped parking spot is not convenience, but rather [in a how did you not see this coming, but non-bragging observation], "I'm closer than you are!" That's right. Handicapped parking spaces are not always and never were entirely about convenience, but always about being the parking spot closest to the entrance of a facility, relative to the non-handicapped parking space it shares the parking lot with. Oh, yes -- that handicapped parking spot thats 3 blocks away from the sports arena's entrance may be 3 blocks away, but it's damn closer to the entrance than the non-handicapped parking spots within the same lot. But in an ironic twist of logic, even this logic doesn't hold up. Remember that large single parking lot with both the bank and restaurant? Well, it has larger handicapped parking spaces, but not only are they no where near the entrance of the restaurant, many rows of non-handicapped parking spaces come before them. So in the end, "accessible parking spaces" are really just about giving privilege to disabled people, sometimes -- which is what we should do in a compassionate and civilized society -- but we're going about it the wrong way. If you're going to spend the time and money to make the lives of disabled people better with a parking space, first make sure there are not only larger handicapped parking spaces in all parking lots, but that these larger handicapped parking spaces exist in front of every facility's entrance. And second, don't put a handicapped parking spot in a parking lot that's 3 blocks away from the entrance of a facility. How is that convenient? No, you take those handicapped parking spots that are 3 blocks away and you move them to the facility's adjacent parking lot. Yes, you'll have to use some of the non-handicapped parking spaces to make this happen, but don't worry -- no one's counting. Resources
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 On an 80°F afternoon in June, I tested Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser on used motor oil that's been sitting on an asphalt driveway for 2 weeks and 4 days. The verdict? 4.5 out of 5 stars. Oil Eater stands out from the crowd of oil degreasers because it is "non-toxic", "biodegradable", and "non-corrosive". It's strong enough to remove motor oil from an asphalt driveway, yet safe enough for prespotting laundry. Oil Eater's SDS (safety data sheet) identifies it as being just a mild skin and eye irritant. The Project's DetailsIn order to get the results I desired with Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser, I did not dilute the product as recommended on the back -- I used full strength -- and needed 3 applications with lots of elbow grease. Here is everything I used to get the used motor oil off of the asphalt:
I used the "Spray" mode on the spray bottle and sprayed each section liberally. From there, I wet the stiff-bristle scrub brush, got on my hands and knees, and scrubbed aggressively for about a minute. Then I hosed the area down and a frothy, cappuccino-like stream made its way down the driveway.  Project items: Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser 32 oz., JOBSMART stiff-bristle scrub brush, nitrile gloves, goggles, and a garden hose.  Frothy, cappuccino-like stream consisting of water, used motor oil, and Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser. Shot 1 of 4 | Before (1:49pm)As you can see, there is a snake-like trail of used motor oil on the asphalt driveway. This shot is what the oil stain looked like before I applied any Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser to it.  Shot 2 of 4 | After Application 1 (2:39pm)After applying Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser for the first time, you can clearly see that the oil stain's appearance has been reduced dramatically. I cleaned the oil trail in 3 different sections for greater cleaning accuracy.  Shot 3 of 4 | After Application 2 (3:28pm)After the second application, an oil trail was no longer discernible, but you could still tell that something has been spilled on the asphalt. I could have stopped here and would have been satisfied with the results, but I decided to give it another application.  Shot 4 of 4 | After Application 3 - FINAL (4:26pm)After the third application, if you didn't know an oil trailed existed here, you'd probably never know unless someone pointed it out.  ConclusionWhen the project was finished, and a couple hours had passed since the fourth and final application of Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser, I would say that well over 95% of the oil trail had been removed from the asphalt. Eco-friendly products tend to have a softer, less effective reputation than their non-eco-friendly counterparts. A non-eco-friendly degreaser may have been able to do better than Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser, but as someone who is highly sensitive to harsh chemicals, and is semi-conscious about what I In the end, Oil Eater's Cleaner Degreaser lived up to its name -- an eco-friendly and exceptional oil eating degreaser. If you don't mind getting on the ground and scrubbing a little bit, this product will reciprocate without any noxious remnants in your nostrils.
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